HOW TO BE IN A LOVE RELATIONSHIP AND MAKE IT WORK!

Chances are, you were taught basic skills such as reading, writing, and how to ride a bike. Yet how many of you were taught how to be in a love relationship and make it work?

   It's quite amazing that in these sophisticated times people are not taught basic relationship skills. It's obviously needed because the divorce statistics are so high, not to mention all the single people out there looking for a mate. That is why I want to share some key factors with you.
       These factors are:
     
 1. Relationship is a path to growth and healing.
     2. The art of listening.
     3. The three A's - Acceptance, Acknowledgment, and Appreciation
     4. The importance of sustaining your emotional bank account.


 1) Relationship is a path to growth and healing.
 The first factor I'd like you to be aware of is that your relationship is a path to growth and healing. Did you know that unconsciously you attract someone to you who will embody both the positive and negative qualities of your parents or caretakers? This is because the path of a love relationship has an underlying purpose - which is the healing of childhood wounds. Just think of how many times a lover will trigger your core issues. For example, let's look at a couple who we will call Ekei and Kum. Suppose Ekei has childhood issues around abandonment. When she and her husband, Kum, get into an argument Kum has a tendency to get angry and walk out on her. This drives Ekei crazy. Why? It unconsciously brings up her fear of abandonment. And Kum walks out because arguing makes him feel frustrated which in turn makes him feel like a failure.

   Okay, that's interesting, you might think. But what does a person do about a situation like that? Well, that brings us to the next factor, which is the art of listening. You can train yourself to become aware of core issues by listening to what your emotions are trying to tell you. The following is an exercise;

2) The Art Of Listening
-  First pay attention to what you are sensing or feeling. Notice where in your body you are feeling the sensation and breathe into that area to release some of the tension there. Then describe the feeling and ask yourself these questions.

AFRICANS SHOULD COME BACK HOME

Click on image to expand(Fig.01)

All through the 80s, 90s and 2000s, Africans have been migrating to the western world at an alarming rate in quest for better opportunities and better standards of living. This migration post slavery took the best from Africa to Europe and the US, especially those whose parents could afford to come up with the payment. That trend is fast changing as the US and Europe’s economies are merely surviving and when growing are only seeing a maximum of 2% GDP per year, and Japan is not even growing. That said were then is the growth and how can we make this tangible. Most African countries are growing at double digits and will continue to grow like that for a while but are Africans profiting from this growth? We know very well that in order to sustain an economy, the main engine of growth is the accumulation of human capital – of knowledge – and the main source of differences in living standards among nations is differences in human capital. Physical capital plays an essential but decidedly subsidiary role. So where is the Human capital from Africa, that countries like Cameroon, Angola, Nigeria and every country in Africa will be having this huge influx of expats, usually with better pay to be taking African jobs away. Does it mean that our fellow Africans cannot perform a simple task as well head inspection in sub sea?
The time for Africans who left in quest for better opportunities and education is now to come back home to help build Africa. Rather than buying the biggest house with a 30 years mortgage in the US or driving the latest car in Europe and then, come to Africa and only complain about lack of amenities, please it’s time for us to become part of the solution and not part of the questions. The western world has thought us the discipline it takes to be successful, let’s come back when we have the strength to make a difference in Africa.


The chart above from the IMF says it all : as the fastest growing  economies in the world are in Africa and we will need the human capital to help grow our continent.
 Africans should come back home.

By Anonymous Contributor.

Have A Nice Day All

THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL ( SELSF LOVE)

It took me a long while to become the person I am now. If I were to describe myself in the past, I would probably say I am a person who longs to be loved for who I am, or else I wouldn’t be happy. I needed to have family and friends with me at all times, for all stages of my life, for me to be happy. In my opinion then, I had a lot of reason to become sad, and to turn out bad in later life.

I lost my mom at a very tender age. I was under the care of mostly, my grandmother and granddad, and in part, by my uncles and aunts. I lived in fear of people leaving me on my own, without family, so I would break my back bending for the people who care about me, so they won’t ever leave me. My family revolved around my elders, and my playmates were my cousins. Though there were a lot of fond memories to remember, in the end, my family did somehow fail me with their shortcomings, even rejecting me when I did my own share of errors. And I had to please them all over again, working hard for their approval and validation, which, for me, had become my definition of love.

But looking at my life again, I realized I did have an inkling of how true love really works. My grandfather never failed me. He loved me unconditionally.
My happiness, during the early part of my life, depended on whether or not I was successful in retaining my family’s favour towards me. Why? I was afraid of becoming rejected and abandoned again, and I looked forward to my family’s admiration of my achievements, their affirmation, their happiness, and therefore, their love. I cannot fail. It would cost me their love, and lead me to the despair of loneliness. Loneliness was never a good friend of mine. I had to make sure my family always thought of me in a good light. I mean, if not my family, then who else will think highly of me? Same goes with my friends and the rest of society.

MISTAKES

LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES

 

I bet everybody knows about the saying nobody is perfect. Well, its true. One way or the other at one time in your life you are bound to make minor and major mistakes. As we get older we find so many things in our past that we tend to regret. These actions tend to make us develop a sense of anger for certain people and worse, for ourselves. A mistake may seem to be a negative thing for you now. But it all depends on how you see things. A mistake can be something you will regret for the rest of your life. A haunting memory you cannot erase. But if we turn the tables around, you may find that some mistakes in your life can make you stronger and wiser. There are lessons to be learned if you just allow these mistakes to teach them to you.

NOBODY IS PERFECT

Again, this line pops up, because it’s true. Just like in the parable of the unfaithful woman, Jesus tried to pass the stone to any person who has no sin and throw it at the accused. He said “He who has

YOUR MOTHER.

 Your mother is your everything. Through her lies your existence. Let's cherish our mother.

8 THINGS SEX CAN DO……

 

1) It makes some people religious =Oh my God,Yes Lord.

2) It gives some people their first musical lessons = Mmmmm, Aaaaah, Oooooooo, Assssshhh

3) Makes some people natural observers = Fast!!!!!!, Fasterrrrrr!!!!, Yeahhh fastestttt!!!

4) Makes some people announce their own obituary = U are killing me,

HUMAN RIGHTS: ABORTION AND ITS TRAUMA

ABORTION

Abortion is a sensitive and contentious issue with religious, moral and political dimensions. It is also a public health concern in many parts of the world. More than one-quarter of the world’s population live in countries where it is prohibited or practiced only to save the woman’s life. Yet, regardless of the legal status, abortions still occurs and nearly half of them are done by unskilled practitioners or in less than sanitary conditions or both.

Abortion claims the lives of thousands of babies and women around the world every day. Yes, every day. That is a fact. While in other cases it leaves that number with chronic and irreversible health problems.

Abortion is never the solution except for medical reasons. Below is a true life story submitted by an anonymous contributor.

MY ABORTION DECISION WILL HAUNT ME TO MY GRAVE

When I missed my period, my boyfriend took the urine sample to the lab, and

The results confirmed what I already knew.

I'd gotten pregnant the first time I had sex.

The baby became our dark secret that we